onerthes | Deerington Inbox

Gah! Yeah, the scar... she has to be the Max who knew Wonderland. Not another Max from another time and another place. Deerington is many things, but no matter how one might hate Julia or Superior, they aren't... how do I put this?

They aren't clever, dedicated and patient enough to forcibly shove a 14 year old max in the specific 20-something year old body of someone who was trapped in another world like this. That's just... TOO much to make sense. They're both cruel bitches, but this is too much even for them.

[She groaned, rubbing her forehead.]

Which means it's memory loss, which almost certainly means it is temporary, but until it ends she's going to be confused as hell.

No, she wasn't fourteen. The last time we saw each other, I was. She's from Blackwell. Before she ever told me she was back in Arcadia Bay. And maybe they've never done it before, but I think it's bullshit if you think this place isn't that cruel.

They brought in a Max who remembered us being in a relationship when I wasn't ready for one, they killed me our first Christmas together so she'd have to go through that all over again, they killed me our second Christmas together so I wouldn't know who she is, they made her hate me in the arena and then immediately had her murdered in front of me, they took her from me the moment I said I love you, and you think they wouldn't steal away all her memories of that for good while shoving the evidence of it all having really existed right in my face?

No offense, Vira, but I think you underestimate how much of a cruel bitch Sodder and the rest of them are by a long shot. I'm not getting my hopes up about it being temporary. I can't take getting my hopes up again.

Forgive me. Just so we're clear... I no longer have any illusions about whether our benefactor, or her grandmother for that matter, are capable of being truly cruel to a level that transcends what human beings are capable of being. They're like children staring at ants with a magnifying lens. As shocking as this might sound? I expect more empathy from Suuperior, and she wants us dead.

[By the way, did Chloe know Superior was Julia's grandma? SURPRISE!]

I just wouldn't have credited Julia with being clever and patient enough to be quite that ...dedicated until you put it that way. No, don't get your hopes up, but let me do it for you because I want you two to be happy.

[She groaned.]

For now, what do you recommend we do for Max? You know this ... for lack of a better word version of her better than me.

It's funny, even as awful as she is, Superior... At least is upfront about her motives and her values. I'd rather a bitch who owns it than some assholes who pretend their innocent when they're just as bad as the rest.

[ She doesn't feel like Sodder's ever going to be an innocent child in her eyes again. Not after Rapture.

She nods at her offer of hoping for her, knowing it's probably the best she can ask for. Maybe if enough other people had hope, it might counteract her own pessimism.

Chloe rubs her forehead, shrugging after a minute. ]

We need to be patient. And not overwhelm her with a bunch of information. Max'll panic and run if things get too much, you know that plenty well even with her being different than the Max you remember. She's even worse now than she was before. She hasn't had the kick in the ass that her powers gave her to make her a stronger person. She'll want distance, she'll want... something familiar and more calm.

[ She stares at the table top. ]

... Photography might actually still bring her comfort. I'd let her just... do her own thing. Process this world the only way she can.

Once upon a time, Julia was an innocent infant who knew not what she did. One look in the madness of Mother Superior tells a truth. She hasn't truly been a child for a long time. And the longer she keeps us here, the harder it is to see her as merely a waif in need of rescuing. I don't wish her harm... but I do not trust her as I once did.

[She was still trying to find a way to 'spare' them all for the moment. She felt like it might matter. Especially after Superior's words... but this was about Max.]

Funny you mention photography. That's how we met this time. I will ... try to be patient. One step at a time. Hopefully it will come back sooner, not later.

...

What can I do for you?

I guess at least that’s something. I’ve seen how fucking disturbed and violent kids can be, I don’t cut her slack just because she’s been like this since she was a baby.

[ She’s also seen how adults have manipulated violent kids, but that part seems to matter less to her when it’s her friends dying. ]

You did? [ Chloe can’t actually stop herself from sounding slightly hopeful; Max hasn’t done photography much at all in the two years they’d had together. It was hard to see when she’d known she loved it so much and knowing she could do it again, even if it meant her memories being stolen...

She sighs. ]

I missed her photos. I hope if she does get them back, her memories don’t take that from her again.

[ She shakes her head, rubbing at her face. ]

I don’t know. Nothing feels real anymore.

She used to do them some when she was here before. I... uh... left her a photo she'd taken when she was here. To help her. I honestly don't think she's ready to trust me.

[She rubbed at her head and sighed softly.]

It feels horrible, surreal, confusing as hell... It's torture in its own way.

Not often. And it's not... It's not how it was at home. [ Where photography had been her life. She couldn't remember Max without a camera in her hand from the time they were kids.

She sighs again, nodding. ]

It's not... fair. None of it's fucking fair.

No Chloe. It isn't fair to you. It isn't fair to her. It isn't fair to me. It isn't fair to any of us. And I... I hate it. I hate everything about it, right down to the selfish thoughts I have because she doesn't reember e, and those dwarf in comparison to the reasons you have to be angry.

But I'm here for you, ok? You don't have to, but you can call me anytime. If I have any say in it. You'll be happy.

[ She's quiet for a moment, because she does know. At this point. She'd gotten better at admitting that she cherished the friendships she had and was trying to let herself lean on people. It was just never her kneejerk reaction. ]

Yeah. I'll... try. I think mostly I just need to figure out what to do on my own.

Look, if you need any advice, you can always poke me. If you want actually GOOD advice, I'd recommend Ashe. She's got her act together better than both of us combined, and you know it. But, I'll be around if you need me.

And... we'll be here for her, when she's ready. Thank you for coming to me, Chloe. [She sighed] One day I want this place to stop being a wretched hive of horrible things.

[ Chloe can't stop the somewhat tired chuckle. ] Ashe's... my mom, dude. She's already had to put up with the major breakdowns around all this shit for the last... however long it's been since Max first fucked off.

It's the least I could do, though. Sorry I couldn't warn you before you actually ran into her.

Mmm, I know. She's better at advice than me, but we both know that. [Chuckle.] And don't worry. She's... just paranoid enough that I think she would have picked up on my familiarity and been more weirded out if I tried to fake it. I'm not actually good at that.

It may have been better that it played out this way. But thanks.

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